Yes, relationships can
sometimes destroy or
end some of your
greatest friendships.
But whose fault is it?
The girl with the new
man or the reactions
of her friends when
she gets the man?
It can easily be a
combination of both. Let's
have a look at some
mistakes that women make
when dealing with the new
man in their life, whether
it's your man or the
friend's man. Here's how
relationships can destroy
friendships:
Assuming your friends are
jealous
"She's just jealous!"…Let's
be honest, we've all
probably said this before.
This is probably the
number one problem that
leads to the destruction of
friendship. Using jealousy
as an excuse to be
inconsiderate of your
friend's feelings or not
listen to what they have to
say is really just an
excuse to continue
swooning over your man.
Your friends maybe
genuinely concerned for
your well-being or
genuinely concerned about
your friendship. Yes, it is
possible that your friend is
jealous, but it is also
possible that she is NOT
jealous. Don't let this be an
excuse to ignore the real
problems.
Expecting everything to be
the same
Time to point the finger at
the friends on this one…
this has got to be one of
the most teenaged
mistakes that friends
make, but believe it or not,
women still continue to do
it even when they get
older. They somehow
expect their friend with the
new boo to still spend as
much time with them.
Nothing in life ever stays
the same…people change
and grow in many different
ways. People always
accept these changes
when it comes to someone
getting a new job, living
further away or just plain
growing up. Why do you
expect relationships to be
any different?
Replacing your friends with
your boo
You've been friends for
years, and what does your
girl do? Toss you aside
like a rag doll for some
guy she's only known for a
few months. A lot of us
definitely know what this
feels like. What makes this
worse is that the more you
try to confront her about
this, the more she
continues to run to her
man. In cases like this, she
is seriously just being a
bad friend. You probably
won't like the resolution to
this one… but in cases like
this, sometimes it's just
not worth trying to repair.
Your man should never be
a replacement for your
friends and if your friend
can't see this, then she
probably doesn't value
your friendship enough.
Assuming your friends will
always be there.
This one is almost like the
last one…except in this
case it doesn't start out
with negative intent. It's
one of those things where
many small things
accumulate into something
huge. It's been a while…
you're thinking should I
have lunch with the ladies
today? No, you say, "I can
have lunch with them next
time, I'm better off having
my man over for a nice
home cooked meal." The
ladies are going out
tonight, but you say "but
they do that every Friday
night, so I'm gonna go see
my boo instead." It might
even be that you're
having friendship drama,
so you decide, I'd rather
go chill with my man than
deal with all the drama. Is
this the right decision?
WRONG! You can't keep
putting your friends at the
bottom of your priority list.
First of all, think about
how this will make them
feel. Second of all, this
works both ways…who are
you going to run to when
you have problems with
your boyfriend? You'll be
lucky if they're even still
there!
Never inviting the
boyfriend to come along
Like any normal female, no
one wants your friend's
man ruining your "girls
night," but come on ladies,
you have to be endearing
and inviting to him too.
Just because you don't
want him to tag along on
girls night, that doesn't
mean that you can't try a
dinner night or some other
special event. Making sure
to sometimes invite both of
them will not only make the
boyfriend more accepting
of you as her friends, but
she will also be more
appreciative of you as a
friend knowing she can
share important aspects of
her life with you.
Stop making plans together
When one of the ladies
gets a new man, women
have a tendency to stop
inviting her out to as many
get-togethers. They may
think that is just being
respectful of the new
relationship and giving
their friend space. Believe
it or not though, some
women get insecure about
this, and rather interpret it
as you having a problem
with their relationship. On
the other hand, sometimes
this is because the women
with the new man has
given a string of no's to
multiple invites just
because she thinks having
a boyfriend is an excuse
to say no. Either way,
there has to be some
balance. Don't automatically
start giving your friend
"space," and don't
automatically assume you
shouldn't try to spend time
with friends just because
you have a boyfriend.
Always wanting your
boyfriend to accompany
you
Let's be real, sometimes
your friends just don't
want your boyfriend
around and sometimes he
just doesn't want to be
around them either. Stop
trying to always mix the
two together! This will only
cause your friends to
resent him because they
feel like he's always
getting in the way, and he
will also feel like your
friends are getting in the
way of your alone time.
Certain things are just
better done with the girls,
and certain things are just
better done alone with the
boyfriend. The sooner you
accept this fact, the easier
life will be.
Forgetting there's a life
outside of your
relationship
In any serious relationship
or even marriage, it
becomes normal to almost
forget there is a life
outside of your
relationship. This one
applies to more than just
friends. It's also about
family, work, leisure, and
just some good old "me"
time. You and your
significant other spend so
much time together, that
this becomes the norm,
and spending time on
things not related to your
other half become not
normal. However, just
because this becomes
normal for you, that
doesn't mean it's healthy.
It's always important to
maintain balance in all
aspects of your life. What
happens if your
relationship doesn't last?
The world will seem like a
very lonely place won't it?
You won't know how to
function outside of the
relationship, and you will
have very few people for
emotional support. You'll
probably feel like the world
has abandoned you, when
in fact, you're the one who
abandoned the world.